The Wife: A bigamy case

“Everyone falls in love and people want to live with the one that they love. Everybody does children, grown-ups, married people, unmarried people and me and this bastard next to me. Even if the person I hate disappears, life doesn’t suddenly become beautiful.”~ Anaega Gyeolhonhaetda

One of the things that I do on my free time is watching Japanese or Korean movies, today I have watched “Anaega Gyeolhonhaetda”: My wife got married. The title strikes me not because I’m a wife who wants to get married but because I think I might want to consider marriage if my wind shifts into the right direction.

At first I expect a regular comedy romance story where the characters will fall in love and get married and then woman will fall in love with another man that will eventually lead to divorce before she gets married again, but slowly as each scene matured I started feeling bizarre as to what the woman wants.

The Story:

The scene in the subway started it all when the woman meets her former colleague and after a drinking reunion the two then realized that they have one thing in common, they love football. The girl offers him to have coffee at her house and everything just followed~ the sex and the relationship. The heroine’s character portrayed a cool, hardworking, intelligent and sexy lass but the downside to her positive traits are her carelessness attitude she refuse to be tied down, she come home late at night drunk, believe that life can be played strategically like a football game and she collects old books not because she reads them, she collects because she love the smell of it. The male protagonist’s character however can be safely classify as any regular guy, a man who falls in love with an exceptional woman and a chap who would do anything to tie the knot so he can pacify her outrageous girlfriend. His goal is to marry and have children with her but the story took its twist not long enough before their honeymoon ends when the woman declared that she wants to marry another guy, but wouldn’t give up their current relationship either.

As a viewer my thoughts are “that’s impossible, this can’t happen in real life, very illusory.” But the portrayals of every character’s emotion are unexpectedly realistic: betrayal, jealousy, helplessness, loneliness, understanding, hatred, paranoia, and desire to keep the relationship prevent me from hitting the stop button.

As the movie progress I was fascinated to see all those motion. Both of the characters holding on to one another, the man accepting her wife’s desire to marry another man, swallowing every pain he can afford to gulp in and the mental battle he has to suffer realizing their role reversal. The wife juggling her time between two men, thus giving them equally love and attention and bearing with both husbands emotional instability. The second husband (not so visible until the mid part) who I think is very subtle, quiet and understanding of his situation. The real drama came when the woman announced her pregnancy and now the question is: who could be the father of the baby?

To make the story short, the first husband took a DNA test to find out who the real father is and announced it during the kid’s birthday party displaying his stubborn competitiveness and jealousy, the woman on the other hand run away from both husbands disappointed and humiliated and the second leading husband was left behind lonely and seeking comfort from the first husband. Then after sometime both men received an invitation to live with the woman they love under her stipulation and both men out of love agreed and they live happily ever after.

Is it realistic or not? Am I not used to this kind of movie because I’m wedged with double standards? But then again putting myself under the first husband’s shoes and trying to feel it when let’s say my husband tells me “I want to marry another woman” would I take time to soak it all in and rationalize things or just dash my way to out leaving my husband behind for falling in love with another woman.

Our society, unfair as it may seem would only permit man’s infidelity, the heroine’s proposal is damned to be ridiculous and socially unacceptable, but why is it not as dreadful as when a husband confess to his wife that he is having an affair? Why does everyone expect the wife to stay and fix whatever there is to be fixed?

My point of view

First of all I don’t understand infidelity, I know that people do change and so as their preferences but why marry if you’re in doubt. Is it enough to say that you did your best but things didn’t work out, if that’s the case then why not just end it instead of giving yourself a hell on earth and why is it socially accepted for men to cheat on their wives? This didn’t take a lot of thinking from me~ because the women allow their men to commit the hideous mistake.

Putting myself in a plain housewife state 100 years ago, when the world is a male-oriented-culture, when females are not allowed to rule, study, work or vote, when we are not allowed to participate in any activity or organization, when woman were classified as a weak, when we play an insignificant role in the society but to raise a kid and to satisfy our husband. Wouldn’t I accept my husband’s apology after confession, when I am fully aware that I’ve no other place to go and won’t cut it through since I’m just a plain house wife? That’s how we got used to the idea that it’s natural for a man to seek relationship outside marriage.

The movie is an eye opener not because I consent bigamy or polygamy or polyandry but because it talks about equality. It’s an unending debatable topic and can come up with millions of rebuttals as to why a wife should not be given the same chance a husband can enjoy.

Just to make myself Clear

I am stating that I am against polygamy of any other form of outside intimate relationships in a married life. I am Pro-Monogamy. Unfortunately things can’t be perfect and you can try all you want or give it a thousand shot. When things don’t work out I dare you woman to stand up and believe that you can make it after a bad relationship. Love is not easy to lose but disrespect is tantamount to a dead relationship.

Are we ready for the Rainy Daze? Ondoy Experience & Preparation

Are we all ready for the down pour or are we just enjoying it because finally the weather is starting to cool down again?

Personally I really like rainy days although last year’s Ondoy pawned me with fear and panic I’m still glad that everyone in my family and friends are safe. Now are we up for another Ondoy?

Recalling the tragedy~ I was stuck in the office tweeting more than 24 hours with no sleep and rest. I remember commanding everyone not to go home and to stay put until I give them a go signal to go home. No telephone lines in almost all residential, no cell phone signals, no electricity in some part of Manila, Rizal, Quezon City and other neighboring province. I was tired and anxious of what’s going to happen next and praying that the rain would stop.

One of my agents was crying because her daughter was stuck inside their house and climbing the 3^rd floor because the flood water has reached the 2^nd floor ceiling.She's not a catholic but we all prayed the rosary. I guess situation like this breaks the barrier between any religions the important thing is that we all have the same intention.

I was pacing back and forth because I can’t contact anyone in my family, although I know that they'll be safe from flood since our location is situated in a higher ground but then again all the roads that lead to our place was flooded and there’s no way they can get out if they run out of supplies. From time to time I would be able to communicate with my cousin via twitter who was also struggling to get an internet connection. And to my surprise they don’t know the gravity of the situation, maybe because they were all stuck in the house with no electricity and telephone connection.

I was all over the internet the whole 42 hours sleeping for only two hours. I was task to take care of our employee, good thing I have extra cash that day since I have to provide food and supplies for them. I was tired physically, emotionally and spiritually. I was having a hard time digesting all the information I’m getting through internet, people crying for help, dying, drowning, children out in the roof drench and cold, elders who can’t do anything because of their aged strength, government officials saying that they don’t have enough boat to rescue people, people twitting missing family members and friends, and people crying in distress. I was hurt and I was crying in the confinement of my office room.

After 3 days I was glad to be home. I was so tired that I passed out in my bed. I also feel so worn out from internet so I went on hiatus. I left twitter, plurk, facebook, tumblr and blogspot. The exhaustion was something that I haven’t felt in my entire life.

I’m wishing and hoping that our government is doing something in preparation for another Ondoy and I’m praying that it won’t happen again. But we all have to be prepared, now, below are the list of things that you should have in your emergency box/kit in case a storm like Ondoy comes again, make sure it’s handy and easy to carry.

Emergency box/ Storm Kit

• Candles and lighter (Butane)
• 3-5 days’ supply of Can goods, Crackers, noodles or dry food (depending on the size of the family)
• Can opener or Swiss Army Knife
• Drinking water
• Flash lights and batteries
• Transistor radio
• Petroleum Jelly (for blisters and incase a child gets shivery, rub it to their belly, underarm and neck it will make them feel warm)
• First aid kit: bandage, paracetamol, medicine for dehydration, cough and cold, rubbing alcohol, cotton balls and other medicine that may be needed for special cases
• Dry clothes and jackets
• Blankets umbrella and big plastic sheet
• All important document should be wrapped and vacuum in a plastic bag

You may add more depending on your needs but remember that an emergency kit should be easy to carry and not too heavy. It should be situated at the easiest place to find and family members should know where to locate it. Finally find a spot in your house where you feel safe just in case a flood arise, make an escape plan and list all the emergency numbers that you might need.

Oh! Hello JUNE and Hello There RAIN *hugs*

Let’s all be safe!

Bashful Smurfette!

Don’t be bashful ~ I remember being told when I refuse to get from the basket of goodies that was being offered to me during one of the conference I was in. Why does it hit me so much? Thinking of how it was said in a gentle manner makes me feel like getting one or two of those pastries. Although I know that I wouldn’t (couldn’t) eat since I was busy taking notes and listening profoundly to all the discussion.

Was I really a bashful Smurfette? Thinking about it and applying it to old scenarios in my life I think at some point I was.

• Scene 1 when being invited to a party: I remember being invited to a lot during my teen years and how many times I’ve turned down invitations, not unless they carry me or drag me out. I don’t mean special treatment I was just too shy to mingle.
• Scene 2 at a party: I would refuse to neither look at anyone in an eye to eye manner nor talk to anyone I don’t know. If they ask me, I just will give them a one liner and leave after. I feel so awkward and uncomfortable unless of course I’m intoxicated LOL (so I drink a lot! Haha!)
• Scene 3 at a party: I remember being offered to eat but refusing because I feel shy and I think it’s not cool.
• Scene 4 when I was in studying: I remember knowing the answers to the questions thrown by my professors but refusing to raise my hand no matter how sure I was, simply because I don’t want anyone’s attention to be drawn at me.
• Scene 5 when I was still playing in a band: I remember how I never talk to anyone other than my band mates during gigs and just giving people a nod, awkward unsure thanks and burying my head low whenever someone said that we/I did well because I was too timid to start a conversation or maybe intimidated.
• Scene 6 when I was at school: I remember being under a lot of stress when someone talks to me on the first day of class beads of sweat running at my back, can’t look at their eyes and my awkwardness are spilling over the place.

So was I bashful? I think I’m more like lacking self confidence or I’m the bearer of inferiority complex back then.

If you just met me yesterday I know that you’ll be giving a lot of bull crap saying that I’m a bad b*stard who talk nonsense or might be asking me if I’m a fictional writer trying to create a fictional character because you can’t see any of those personality coming from me…but in reality I was “before” that shy, timid, coy, bashful, insecure, introvert, unconfident, antisocial girl in the corner trying to blend within the walls of the room.

My present smurfette:
When you offer me something that I refuse to take and say "No, Thank you!" I really mean NO, it’s not because I’m being bashful or shy its just that I really don’t like it. Yeah I know sometimes or most of the times I’m so full of myself and my big mouth is uncontrollable, I laugh the loudest now, I eat like a pig unless I’m on a diet, I’m that sarcastic blunt person who can’t contain her thoughts and I randomly speak to strangers specially if I caught them looking at me, I just can’t help but ask them why they stare. And sometimes you don’t need to send any invitation I will just show my self in front of your door the moment you say you’ll have a party (don’t worry I don’t do gate crash, I still follow my manners and that’s too unfashionable hahaha) .

I don’t know when or how exactly I recovered those confidence but slowly I have gained it maybe because of my family, my group of friends, my elders who pushed me to lead all those youth organization, the books that I have read, the bands that I have joined and the number of times I stood in front of the stage, those amazing people I meet and inspired me to speak my mind and be the best just like them. Those people who never hold themselves from giving me my bad and good points. Or maybe because despite all of that timidity I am really competitive and losing is something that I can’t stand and lastly maybe because I’m a dreamer I know that keeping myself quiet will only give credit to those people who speak out my ideas.

Broadcast 2000 Awesomeness Music!

I’ve learned about Broadcast 2000 three years ago when I accidentally fall on their single “Get up and Go” while searching at playlist.com for Broadcast “Tender Buttons” (a space pop indie-rock band in England). I was intrigued with Broadcast 2000's music mainly because it was catchy and the melody is soothing to the ears plus the fact that it sounded more than the regular guitar, keyboard, bass and drums. Broadcast 2000 have incorporated instruments like cello, glockenspiel, banjo, ukulele, violin and percussion in their sound, plus the layering of vocals that added appeal to their music. Joe Steer (Vocalist/Songwriter) described their music as “folk-influenced indie Acoustic”.

Their music is very calming and may drive you frantic at the same time, not too noisy and not too pop, the unique mixture of instruments gives you something that you don’t get everyday. Steer offers promising lyrics that speaks to the soul with very likable melody that can stir your emotions. I like it because they don’t sound redundant you can expect different taste in every cut. Steer’s voice is also a big factor in bringing out the essence in their music.

Broadcast 2000 music was mostly used in various advertisements and commercials in UK I guess because they sound very appealing. While searching I stumbled upon some blog reviews and interviews I found out that Joe Steer has no permanent band members, he’s being joined by various musicians. He mentioned that sometimes he does gig with just 3 of his band members or sometimes all nine of them. He also mentioned that most of his songs are recorded and mixed in his bedroom in London. Nevertheless, I really like all of his song, his brilliant song writing talent and the ability to create an excellent melody is a lethal combination. As far as I’m aware of they just debuted live in US this year but their album Building block was released last 2008.

Listen to Get Up and Go <----------- click here

I’m Swimming Moon: A losers' Journal for summer of 2010

First things First, Let me share this:

I love you Summer Sea, the scent of the morning ocean, the wind that blew in my face, the ebb and flow of the salty water in my shinny feet when I walk your sandy shore will always be in my heart (lol I’m trying to write a short story here JOKE). But I loath the idea of the sun kissing myskin (at least for this summer)…I refuse to be engulf with your torrid French kiss…it’s like kissing a teenage kiddo, first timer and salivating all over my face (LOL) I bet my mouth will swell…That’s how I will describe you summer of 2010 sweet and gross…sunscreen will lose its value and yes! no SPF is good enough for you.

So there, go swim lazy ass in thy inflatable giant pool with lots n’ lotsa balls…I has balls! Oh yes!

I am the perfect epitome of a Dead Kid if we talk about summer of 2010.

This is the most boring summer I ever had in my life. I didn’t prepare any summer activities unlike last year when I went around beach bumming in different places.

I’ve lost interest this summer simply because I can’t stand the heat. Manila can be mistaken as a brick oven waiting for Hansel and Gretel to be baked. And I refuse so I held the stick for the hungry witch.

Not only that I hate the heat, I’m also extremely lazy to think around planning and searching for a nice place to go. Last year I’ve planned to go to Anawagin for this year, but not anymore Although Anawagin is really a nice place to go (I know you don’t have to bash at how stupid I can be). I hate the fact that I have to ride a bus, then ride a trike, then ride a boat, then set up a tent, then cook my own meal, then get drunk at night with cheap vodka or rum, then pass out, then sleep with mosquitoes, then wake up with killer hangover and insect bites, then use the common bathroom, and then wash myself in the deep well pump, then panic because my time is almost up while folding the tent and I’m still hangover and the boat ride is waiting and those things that will make me more stress than relax.

Don’t get me wrong I’m not a prima donna or no douchebag or something I just hate the idea of going to a vacay while stressing the whole time thinking what I should do next or have I done this and that or do we have supplies, food, drinks and other that will fancy me. Few years back I wouldn’t even think twice doing those things but I’m tired of my life in the metro so I would rather enjoy things that are less strenuous. Excuse me to those who enjoyed Anawagin this summer, maybe next year I will try and plan again.

Let’s me reminisce my last year’s beach get away at least that’s the best thing I can do for this loser’s summer:

Cagbalete Trip with my friends

Laiya Batangas with my Team:

Bintan Indonesia with my Family:

Sentosa Singapore


Amana Water Park

This years Activity:

BATAAN

Nothing Else.

I remember one thing that makes me say no to beach this year. A friend of mine just told me recently how dark my complexion was last year after returning from Singapore. He actually uses the word "DARKOIDS" and I was laughing outside and cursing him in my mind LOL. My complexion is still dark though I’m a natural Filipina.

Well summer of 2010 is almost over and I can’t wait for the rain to come and swim in the moon but please don’t give us another Ondoy Mr. Fickle Weather.

I’m not Human~ Humans don’t go to Space

Tick Tock I barely get enough sleep and here you go my darling Alarm clock ringing on my ear. Everyday I set two alarms just to make sure that I’ll be awake on time, sometimes I succeed but more than half of my life time I fail hahaha!

The down side of not getting enough sleep is now taking over me. Today I have to endure this excruciating report. Numbers are flashing all over my non comprehensive brain. I hate numbers I told myself but then again as I was analyzing this oh so beautiful report I realized that it’s not really difficult I was telling myself “how can you be so dumb when you are using excel to calculate and do all the math for your lame brain, all you gotta do is remember all those effin formula” but I can’t my brain just won’t process. I resort to searching and retrieving my old reports to help me remember those formula, function and what not. Haist I’m not really good at this.

I also gathered my people to give them my two cents on how they should handle their performance and to voice out some of the conditions I have set for them. BUT I was stuttering my tongue was arguing with my brain as to what words to use to properly express myself. But Ms. Luna brain was busy spacing out, hitch hiking somewhere between Mars and Venus and would not cooperate. Although I gave a very fine speech and was able to send my message across, I know that is not the best of me. What to do???

So I went to my friendly ministop to get myself a cup of coffee, my third coffee since I arrived in the office three hours passed. Nope coffee doesn’t work anymore. I’m not sleepy, not even sluggish, my eyes are not even heavy but I was spacing out real bad. I would stare into space for few second and flashes of thoughts would come to me, things that I have to do for the day and things that I have to remember but as soon as I’m back I can’t recall those things. This is frustrating. Am I getting nuts? Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

I need to get some sleep at least 6-8 hours everyday. I have to remind myself that I am human. And as a human I need to get some rest, I need to sleep and visit dream land…hmmm no wonder I can’t recall any of my dreams. Dumb I’m not having dreams because well, you know I’m not sleeping…so I’ll just see you in space LOL…

Anyways here are the things that should help you sleep:

• Warm hot milk ~ I’m lactose intolerance so this won’t help LOL
• Listen to soft music ~ I tend to analyze sounds when I hear one, I listen to every words and digest each meaning, I listen to every part of the instruments and hear each part as single melody. So again this wouldn’t help.
• Read books~ once I open a page in a book I can help but continue reading even if my eyes are dropping…books are too interesting to be used as a tool to sleep.
• Count sheep~ I’ve finish counting the sheep in this world and still won’t help. I even counted those who were to be born and I haven’t seen any improvements.
• Drink sleeping pills~ I have a tendency for substance dependence so I stay away from pills.
• Stop drinking coffee~ ARE YOU EFFIN KIDDING ME!
• Stop logging to internet FACEBBOK/BLOG/PROBOARDS/ FORUM/ MICRO BLOGGING ETC.~ will someone send me a time machine to travel back to 1852…I need help to go back to when technology means Transcontinental Railroad and enhancement of bicycles.

Here are the tips I found while lurking in the web:

• FOCUS ON YOUR TOES! ~Ahhh! this has something to do with focus and relaxation lol I though you have to look at your toes while sleeping! Toink!
• Imagine a pendulum in your mind. ~ Hehehe imagine a swinging pendulum in your mind…this is more than the spacing out that I can handle.
• Imagine you are a computer. ~ Hahaha! Imagine yourself as shutting down! NOTE: FOR COMPUTER ADDICTS.
• Use Caffeine to your advantage. ~ This just woo me…taking soda or tea at least 3 hours before sleeping…makes sense right! This contains energy builders that makes our body active for a certain period of time and after it wears off, your system will be tired and will be asking for rest. Hmmm…but you know that I’m a happy bubuli I have certain level of serotonin and dopamine in my body that doesn’t wear off. lolz
• Think of your favorite people ~ oh no! This will make me obsesses to… *GRINS* nope, I won’t do this.

Well anyways I hope to use at least of those…one tip at a time…starting today…I’ll go with the pendulum since I’m already here spacing out! Peace out!