Sometimes I try to do things and it just doesn't work out the way I want it to. And I get real frustrated. It's like, I try hard to do it and I take my time, but it just doesn't work out the way I want it to. It's like I concentrate on it real hard, but it just doesn't work out. And everything I do and everything I try, it never turns out! It's like; I need time to figure these things out. There's always someone there going,
"Hey Mike, you know, we’ve been noticing you've been having a lot of problems lately, you know. You should maybe get away, and like, maybe you should talk about it, you’d feel a lot better."
I go, "No, its okay you know, I'll figure it out. Just leave me alone, I'll figure it out you know, I'm just working on myself."
And they go, "Well, you know, if you wanna talk about it, I'll be here ya know, and you'll probably feel a lot better if ya talked about it, so why don'tcha talk about it?!"
I go, "No! I don't want to I'm okay! I'll figure it out myself!"
Who cares if we fail and vent out all our frustration into something like writing or drinking or crying or shouting, isn’t that normal? Sometimes we go over board if another person inflict us displeasure… what do you want us to do sit down, watch and smile, and just let that person snatch or destroy everything that we have? And so if we act hurt and express our emotion people will think that we’ve gone crazy or something bad is going to happen. They go offering support and asking question when all you want is total silence to contemplate on the things that’s running in your mind, while everyone’s playing their own favorite role: a psychologist or a therapist without license. But hey! For as long as I’m not killing anyone or inflicting pain on myself or committing arson I think people should back out and mind there own little business.
She goes, "No, you're on drugs!"
I go, "Mom, I'm okay, I'm just thinking."
She goes, "No, you're not thinking, you're on drugs! Normal people don't act in that way!"
I go, "Mom, just give me a Pepsi please, all I want is a Pepsi." And she wouldn't give it to me! Just one Pepsi! And she wouldn't give it to me! All I wanted was a Pepsi! Just a Pepsi!
Damn it! The son Just wants Pepsi and the mother won't give it to him because she thinks his son is an addict!~~~ Supports are expected from everyone in the Family, but I see a lot of dysfunctional family relationship, when I say dysfunctional family it should not be mistaken that for broken family~~that’s misconception. Dysfunctional family means that they fail to communicate and know who their family members are; in which conflict, misbehavior and abuse on the each part of individual members happen continually or shall I say its part of their daily routine. I’ve grown up in a family that doesn’t have any fraternal influence and our family is quite big, as in, Big Extended Traditional Filipino Family. I was raised by my mother with the help of her two sisters and brother in laws who never judge and assume but let me speak my mind freely without inhibition. Even though I was not guided by fatherly rules my family never fails to discipline, support and understand me. We had our share of fights and misunderstanding but we always sit down and calibrate on whatever issues we have. I believe that everyone in my family offers understanding, patience and support, reasons why I, my sibling and my cousins learned not to mess around.
Our society is the real killer, sometimes I think they dictate too much that everyone is dying and trying so hard to be on top of their standards. Our society is the one who dictates our social status and roles. In my own words they are the one who can classify the poor from the aristocrat. They are the one who categorize the insane from the plainly idiotic or stupid. When they tag you as insane expect that everyone will be looking at you like you’ve committed a heinous crime or you're infected with some morbid contagious disease. I know that Society is essential for implementing rules to have peace and order but most of the times it’s just cliché and stereotype.
This line should own you “How can you say what my best interest is!? When I went to your schools! I went to your churches! I went to your institutional learning facilities!” I’m not saying that humanity is bad in general, it’s a just that I think that we sometimes fail to see the real essence of each individuals and fail to recognized that each person are born unique. We don’t think the same, we don’t act the same, and we don’t eat and sh*t the same stuff!
I’m tired explaining this I’m sure those who are reading this will understand where I’m coming from. Bottom line: I hate the fact that people are judging others and saying what’s best for them, when they also have their own dysfunctional life. HEY! why don’t you just institutionalize yourself!
